ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
no, he came in my armpit
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
