is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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