True but thats because hes a fetus.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
