Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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