so that wasnt chicken after all
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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