she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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