i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
