it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
