He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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