you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
