well I can't set my house on fire every night
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
