Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
