Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
