i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You are a genius and a whore.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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