I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
