I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
thus making me awesome and them whores
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
