Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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