Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
