is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize