Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
