I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
This beer is not sobering me up at all
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
