And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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