It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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