I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
