Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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