good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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