I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize