Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
