i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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