I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
