is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
