I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
