There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
