There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
