I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
