I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize