remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
