I'm gonna have a badass scar
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
