oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
