yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
