We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
