I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Randomize
