'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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