3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Randomize
