Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize