I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize