I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
