So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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