Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
