I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Randomize