I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
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